October 2010
30 posts
Purple mascara majesty...
Gary patted himself on the back for finally finding a gift for Elaine that combined her love for our first president with her favorite band The Cure.
Oct 30th
30 notes
Hostile hosting...
Sick of out-of-town visitors overstaying their welcome, Gary and Elaine decided to make their guest bed a little less comfortable.
Oct 29th
27 notes
Soldiering on...
And then, in the middle of their game of whist, Elaine dropped the bomb on Gary that the plates were in fact Nutcrackers, not robots.
Oct 28th
Going the distance...
Gary decided to officially test Elaine’s claim that the couch was just a hop, skip, and a jump to the kitchen.
Oct 28th
Halloween posts on babble.com
Gary and Elaine’s favorite parenting website, babble.com, is featuring exclusive Halloween-themed posts to inspire your weekend festivities.  Check them out here.  (Gary feels the need to explain that you should click on the word “here.”  No, not that one in quotes right there.  The one before that.)
Oct 27th
8 notes
Home is where the art is...
A quick call to Melanie reminded Elaine of two important items: this time her painting should be on paper, and she could stand to drop a few pounds.
Oct 27th
30 notes
Tisn't quite the season...
Embarrassed by their premature arrival, Gary & Elaine’s decorative Christmas trees made their way upstairs to hide for another month.
Oct 26th
135 notes
Checking it twice...
Oh, it’s not all holiday spirit.  The Halls are our next door neighbors.
Oct 25th
109 notes
Flame on...
Grace was pleased with herself, having escaped being eaten by hiding in this cluster of trees. But why was it so warm, she wondered as her smile literally melted.
Oct 23rd
45 notes
Abstract art...
…and that was the last time Gary was put in charge of the Decorative Holiday Shelf.
Oct 22nd
40 notes
Reflections of...
With the enormous mirror directly in front of him, Gary couldn’t help but wonder if eating made him look fat.
Oct 21st
Extracurricular activities...
Honestly Gary, I have no idea why Mario and David think that Amy gets special treatment.
Oct 20th
24 notes
It's a sign...
Gary chuckled knowing that somewhere in Belgium a driver was hopelessly lost, having missed the turn at Via Kalenberg.
Oct 19th
52 notes
Greasing the wheels...
Elaine was thrilled to finally have a classy way to enjoy the occasional swig of olive oil in public.
Oct 18th
44 notes
Third party intervention...
Oooh wine!  Let’s see, a couple of antique door knobs, a bird, a rooster, a…ELAINE!!!
Oct 16th
Holidaze...
Gary, I don’t know if there’s another bird inside the inner bird. Quit philosophizing and finish decorating the tree.
Oct 16th
Barking up the wrong tree...
Employing their allergen-free guard dog, Gary and Elaine just have to hope any potential burglar will glance down before breaking in.
Oct 15th
28 notes
Looking for gourds in all the wrong places...
Gary spends all his free time working on the “What Catalog is That From?” link at the top of the page.  Find out where things are from and validate Gary at the same time.
Oct 15th
Light it up...
Gary, the next time you think a household task is beyond your capabilities, please just tell me.
Oct 14th
38 notes
Pear necessities...
Of course it’s an easy job to stand the pears up on the board, but the sooner I get it right the sooner Elaine gives me something else to do.
Oct 13th
30 notes
Tacky tacky tacky...
The pushpins were left behind as Gary furiously ran to the store with the two notes they had previously held: “Buy fruit for second bowl” and “Buy fruit for third bowl.”
Oct 12th
42 notes
Warm and inviting...
As if the pile of leaves in front of Gary and Elaine’s door weren’t enough, the haphazardly placed welcome sign removed any doubt that no one, in fact, was welcome.
Oct 11th
Me time...
At 10:30 every morning, when Gary’s rolled up all his beige paper and put away his giant compasses, he takes a moment for himself to sit in his favorite chair and do a quick “Mork calling Orson” monologue.
Oct 9th
60 notes
Something to crow about...
Gary and Elaine are having a hard time adjusting to their new vegetarian lifestyle, partially because their dinner consists of a bowl of lettuce and two tomatoes, but more so because their plates offer a constant reminder of what they’re missing.
Oct 8th
58 notes
That's what friends are for...
Gary misunderstood Elaine’s Scarface quote and pulled over a stool in anticipation of saying hello her little friend.
Oct 7th
39 notes
Dropping a hint...
Sometimes the kids need to know that Gary and I think they’ve put on a little weight.
Oct 6th
40 notes
One is the loneliest...
With Elaine out of town, Gary couldn’t even enjoy his favorite dinner of brie and tree branch.
Oct 5th
69 notes
Oct 4th
51 notes
At your beak and call...
Gary always resented the bird for being the least useful of the living room wildlife.
Oct 2nd
92 notes
Shades of grey...
Sorry, Gary can’t come to the phone right now. He’s working on another “masterpiece.”
Oct 1st
56 notes